Choosing the right words matter. Even more so in a heated disagreement. So it's helpful to get some advice on how to say the exact thing that helps the person go from boiling mad to cool as a cucumber.
“With conflict, there are typically negative emotions involved, and most of us aren’t comfortable with those kinds of feelings,” she says. Our discomfort can make us fumble over our words or say things we don’t mean.
https://hbrascend.org/topics/choose-the-right-words-in-an-argument/